From Gay to Ze

From Gay to Ze

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Baby's first Pride: she was running through the revellers in Soho Sq in her wonky tiara, tipping over bottles of poppers and stepping on fag packets...
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Baby's first Pride: she was running through the revellers in Soho Sq in her wonky tiara, tipping over bottles of poppers and stepping on fag packets...

Plus: Power aunties, the lesbian couple who might be sisters and what the overturning of Roe v. Wade could mean for queer parents

Jul 03, 2022
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From Gay to Ze
From Gay to Ze
Baby's first Pride: she was running through the revellers in Soho Sq in her wonky tiara, tipping over bottles of poppers and stepping on fag packets...
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I had two big nights out in a row last week. It was my chance to let loose a little after eight days of solo parenting while my wife was away on a work trip. As regular readers will remember I’m not much of a party animal, but at the end of an intense period of parenting I accidentally went harder than usual and had a very excellent time. On Wednesday I went to see Oliver Sim’s first solo London gig. It was emotional.

His songs - which traverse the experience of being diagnosed with HIV aged 17 and fighting addiction, self-loathing and gay shame are beautiful and haunting. He talks about radical honesty setting him free, and does so with such lightness and humour. Also, I had a seat, which frankly at my age is what makes a good gig great. My cousin Romy, who is more like my sister really, joined Oliver on stage and I realised how much I missed hearing their voices together in their band The xx. The next day I showed E some videos of The xx’s 2017 Glastonbury show and she has finally acknowledged how cool her aunty is!

“Do you want children one day?” I asked them like an old drunk aunt at a wedding.

My second night out was to the Serpentine Party which provided exceptional celeb-spotting. Romy DJed and it poured with rain. Her first song was It’s Raining Men and the mood instantly lifted. People in very few clothes huddled under umbrellas nibbling soggy canapés. After, we made a quick escape to Annabel’s for a Pride party, which seemed at first to be full of straight people. I found the actual queers in the smoking area and got talking to two of the most beautiful boys I’ve ever seen. “Do you want children one day?” I asked them like an old drunk aunt at a wedding. We had an interesting chat on the back of my tactless probing. They’d want to be in a secure relationship first, they said.

Hot, smart and kind, @c_a_i_n and @ashleyreec made my night

I recently met a polyamorous non-binary queer throuple raising “theybies”

I find it so interesting that young queer people, pushing boundaries in every other aspect of their lives and identities still think of parenting in such heteronormative terms. I recently met a polyamorous non-binary queer throuple raising “theybies” (their term) and it made me realise how few examples we see of truly ‘queer’ or alternative parenting in our community. They must exist! But I suppose the two Mums / two Dads version is the most ‘palatable’ for the masses?

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E’s first Pride brunch!

My daughter walked in her first drag ball runway and won!

Anyway, the festivities have continued into the weekend with London Pride. How was it for you? Did you go? Did you go with kids? We took E to a Pride brunch at the Bloomsbury hotel which felt like a civilised way to celebrate with a four-year-old. She got stuck right in, dancing in front of the DJ booth, spinning and prancing with the drag performer and dancers and, to my great pride - she walked in her first drag ball runway and won! Category was Baby Queen.

We did venture out to Soho Square, but we’d all peaked a bit too soon and after eating her bodyweight in sugar at brunch she was running through the revellers in the park in her wonky tiara, tipping over bottles of poppers and stepping on fag packets as she went. I swooped her into the push chair and we headed home with, on her insistence, G-L-A-M-O-R-O-U-S by Fergie playing at full volume from my iphone!

If you enjoyed reading this, please subscribe for just £4 a month to support our Gay to Ze endeavours.

Today, paid subscribers will be able to read: a round up of LGBTQ parenting news, be invited to a free webinar with the wold’s largest sperm and egg bank and find out more about what the overturning of Roe V Wade could mean for LGBTQ parents in the US. Lotte will also share what she’s watching, reading and listening to this week.

Going forward paid subscribers will be the first to know about meet-ups and events, will be able to talk to each other about their experiences on our chat forum and get cultural recommendations from Lotte and Stu. Please subscribe - we will love you forever!

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